Little Surprises

Hey Stink!

You are living up to your name tonight.  Jonathan has been cleaning the room you guys shared, still and always knows as "The Boys Room."  The things we have found....  you sure were a sneaky little boy!  Remember the house you promised to build me and make Katie and Jonathan live in the back yard because they are too messy?  Well Luke..... I guess it is good there isn't Nesquik and peanut butter in heaven.  And if there is, at least it won't mold when you hide them in the closet in your big house in the sky! 

We have parts of your Leap Pad, your 3DS and all of your animal hospital.  I have a large tote full of your clothes, you had more footie jammies than a Carter's outlet.

I am really proud of Jonathan, he is handling the cleaning a LOT better than I am.  He started a few weeks ago with Crackle, but Crackle has been on vacation, so Jon's surprise for him when he gets back is a completely clean room. Or at least as clean as a 10 year old can clean.

I am working on going back in the kitchen, but it is so hard Lukie.  Every time I go in there to cook, I hear your little squeaky voice asking what are you making, can I help, can I break the eggs, lick the bowl, put the cheese on.  You would bring me a cook book and tell me all the things we would make next.

Sometimes I think you are haunting Snowball.  He has decided whenever I sit in my chair, he has to sit on my chest and put his head on my shoulder.  Like you used to do.  You would sit on the arm of the chair and put your head on my shoulder.  I miss brushing your hair off your forehead and kissing your head. I miss you smelling like rainbows and butterflies after playing outside.  I miss you running across the room and throwing yourself in my arms for all you were worth.  

There is a huge hole where you are supposed to be baby.  I miss you so very much Lukie.  Some days the tears fall freely, like today.  Other days, the screams come from the depths of my soul, but there are no tears.  I can't help but wonder what the neighbors think as I scream in the shower.  Scream and wail.....

Next year you would be third grade.  Such a Big Boy bubby.  I think you would start being embarrassed about being my babybubberbutt.  But I am going to hold you to your promise that you will always be My BabyBubberButt.

I love you baby boy.  Tell Grandpa and Papaw and Great Granny and your brothers I love them and miss them too.

Mama